Coast orbs

Spirit photography is truly a fascinating phenomenon.

It’s been a hobby of mine for many years, with much investment in research and experimentation. But it usually involves me sneaking around at night with my camera, photographing old cemeteries and other allegedly haunted places. If I’m lucky, I capture images of orbs and other types of possible spirit energy. I might also encounter occasional weird looks and mockery from skeptics, but obviously that just goes with the territory. 

Some of my results have been simply amazing. I have photos of bright balls of light drifting down crypt stairs, floating in trees, and dancing among gravestones. However, I’ve never photographed what appeared to be a genuine spirit orb without intentionally “ghost hunting.”

Until last November. 

It was election day, and I was quite distraught over the results. I needed a calming distraction, so I went for one of my walks on the cliffs near my house. Camera in hand, I stared out at the vast stretch of ocean and sky, and took random photos along the trail. I sensed a strange, unsettling energy in the air, as if Mother Nature herself was upset at the current state of the world, and fearful of the future. I wasn’t too observant of the photos I took that day, and went on to forget about them. But recently, upon closer inspection, I discovered a pretty cool surprise in a few of the shots. 

In one photo, there is a bright turquoise orb hovering above the ocean. In another photo, what appears to be the same orb (or one very similar to it) is sitting on the trail that winds around the cliffs. They aren’t transparant, which is a good indication they’re authentic, rather than a product of lens flare or moisture. Since orbs consist entirely of energy, (if they’re actual spirits) it might explain the vibes I was picking up that day. Who knows. I can’t say for sure, but I’m definitely open to the possibility.

In any case, it was certainly an interesting find. And a good excuse to start knocking some dust off this old blog. 

You’ve gotta love the mysterious wonders in this world, especially those that turn up where and when you least expect such. 

Home

34421406This is the sea wall in Depoe Bay, which is about a 5 minute walk from my house. See the cluster of trees on the rocks?  I live right behind them, they’re visible from my bedroom window. When I go to bed with the window open, I get to drift off to the sound of the ocean, foghorns and the occasional squawk of seagulls. I never knew they were so vocal at night, but it’s a calming sound at any time. Well, at least to me.

On past road trips, I’ve always loved passing through here. It’s one of the prettiest little towns on the coast. I’d sit at this spot by the wall, look over at those trees and think, “damn, that would be an amazing place to live.” And a few years later, guess what? I’m tucked away on that peaceful little island surrounded by water and paying less for rent than I did in my old apartment. Awesome, but weird. I’ve never had any kind of charmed life, and I certainly don’t feel worthy of such a taste.

Life here is healthy for the soul. It’s a distraction from the chaos going on in the world. That’s a good thing, as all of the crap I see on the news and social media lately hurts my head and heart. It makes me afraid for the world, especially when people want to put one of two monsters in charge. But I digress, I won’t discuss politics publicly. It’s just a lot of drama, not worthy of my precious time and energy.

It’s time to go out and soak up another glorious coastal day. More to come later.DepoeBay

 

40 years & 100 miles

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I know I’ve been quiet for a while.

I’ve been busy as hell, and so very tired. In recent months, it’s felt as if I’m walking through a dream. Sometimes in the middle of doing something, or talking to someone, my mind has zoned out and tried to assess whether the moment  is “real.” And I’m just waiting to wake up in the darkness of my familiar ghetto, and pour myself another cup of “melancoffee.” Hm, I guess I just invented a new word. Maybe the clever switch in my brain got turned back on. Or perhaps it’s just more nonsensical babble coming from thoughts that are still a bit muddy. Hell if I know.

To get to the point, February 2016 marked the end of 40 years in Beaverton for me. A new chapter was opened, 100 miles away.  Stagnant city air gave way to fresh salty breezes. The noise of traffic, crowds, and random chaos turned into wild waves crashing on cliffs, and the squawk of seagulls flying overhead. A lifetime of apartment living, and laundromats became a house with it’s own washer and dryer. Something most people take for granted, but I have never known what it’s like to live in such a setting. My husband thinks it’s cute because I call laundry “fun” now, and I’m excited to try Tide Pods when we buy detergent next.

Yes, I’m now living on the beautiful Oregon coast, in Depoe Bay.  In an old single wide mobile home with a huge deck that has a partial ocean view. Right across the street are the majestic cliffs of Pirate Cove. It’s a glorious new world, and just as close as a broke person can get to living in paradise.  There is a short walk from my house to the end of my street, (the equivalent distance of walking from my old apartment to the mailbox) where there is a small rock that says “Depoe Bay Scenic Area.” Right beyond it is a short trail that opens up to the breathtaking sight of huge rolling waves. There’s a few benches along a winding path, and you can feel the vibrations of waves hitting the rocks, as you sit there in wonder of it all. It’s usually a place of perfect solitude, aside from the occasional person walking their dogs, whale watching, or fishing off the cliffs, which has made me want to get a pole and start catching my own dinner. I certainly intend to walk there as much as possible, soak it all in, and just start feeling…better.

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The food is amazing here, as well. And it’s all within walking distance from our house. The Tidepool Pub has some of the best pizza and onion rings I’ve had in my life.  Gracie’s Sea Hag has decadent crab & shrimp stuffed mushrooms to die for. And, we have found our coastal equivalent to The Golden Crown – a funky little Tiki themed Chinese dive called Wing Wa.  The dishes are yummy and comforting. We’ve spent hours listening to the amusing banter of old time regulars, and getting lost in Long Islands that are strong enough to erase the memory of how we got home. (Good thing we live so close we don’t have to drive.) As a few of the reviews on Yelp have said, it’s a great taste of local culture.

I wish I could say all is perfect, but life never is. As much as our little tin can is beginning to feel cozy and homey, it’s  got some major issues. It’s a 46 year old mobile home, after all. There are electrical problems. It’s completely rotten underneath the house, and in certain spots, like on the ceiling inside of one of the kitchen cupboards. The insulation has totally decomposed. The windows are of the old, cracked, broken, aluminum variety. Some are open a bit, and won’t close. The real estate place seems less than interested in fixing them, so we may have to take matters into our own hands. No question – even with it’s serene neighborhood, and beautiful view from the front porch, (which is perfect for summer BBQ-ing and coffee on nice mornings) our home needs serious weatherizing before winter rolls around again.

All of that was enough to make me want to give up, and go back to the apartment on the first night I was here. I was alone, overwhelmed, and scared. But Bob couldn’t drive me anywhere after work that evening, as he had a bad attack of sciatica. And by the next day, I decided to put my big girl panties on, face my fears, and make it work. My first walk on the cliffs gave me a lot of the motivation I needed. I looked around and realized I’d be crazy to give up this kind of beauty, just because I was afraid. No way – I want this. My heart has always wanted this.

I think the choice was a good one. And I have faith that things will change for the better because of it. So many miracles have happened already, I can’t help but wonder what’s next.

 

 

 

A new home

Sorry about the lack of updates here in the past few months. But here’s what’s up, in the words of my better half. Nicely said, dear.

I hope to start posting again soon, when time allows.

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So we now have a new home on the Oregon coast. In Depoe Bay, to be somewhat more precise. Lisa is in Beaverton, packing up the stuff in the old apartment while I’m down here working two jobs that I’ve been doing for a few months now. We finally are jumping out of the rut we’ve been in for years now, and I for one couldn’t be more overjoyed. For some time, my Lady has been getting more and more certain that all I was ever going to do was sit on my ass and smoke my pot, reading comics and being a couch potato. I told her, time and again, that we were going to make it when the time was right, and to have faith in us, but her faith was dying; and the more time went by, the faster that death approached. We were approaching a time…

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First kiss of winter

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The past week has brought more flooding and disaster to the Northwest than I’ve ever seen. There’s a non stop torrent of rain and winds.  Cars and homes completely underwater. Roads washed away. All that’s left is for Noah’s ark to suddenly appear. I’m glad that I’m safe and dry, aside from the drip-drips of the perpetually leaky patio door and rotten apartment wall.

It hasn’t been quite as cozy for my better half. This first wild week of December weather is also his first week of assistant managing at Lincoln City Chevron. His days are spent pumping gas in 70 mph coastal winds, with hard rain blowing sideways. He’s a real trooper though, and handles it with a smile and a positive glow. He’s doing it for us. For me. Aside from my parents and my sister, nobody in my lifetime has ever put forth such great effort for the sake of making me happy. I’m stunned, amazed, and quite honestly brought to my knees by the love this guy shows for me.

I have 3 1/2 days with him this week. After that, we’ll rarely be seeing each other until we find a place to live. He’ll be working steady at the coast from here on out, his one day off from his jobs will be used to search for housing.  Me?  I’ll be keeping busy with responsibilities on the other end, and making preparations to cut the 40 year old ties with Beaverton. Lots to be done for sure, and it’s slow going alone, with asthma and a bad back. But things are getting accomplished. Rough roads are to be expected. Relocating, especially when you’re poor, means hard work and sacrifice. And I’m fine with that, I could use a little toughening up.

Certain things that are a given for others are a long shot for me right now. Spending Christmas and New Year’s Eve with Bob is a bit of a pipe dream. I wish the possibility looked more promising, but I’d need motel money, which isn’t readily available. And there are certain people who adamantly think we shouldn’t have that time together. They chastise me for even thinking of spending the holidays with him. They say that it isn’t trying hard enough. That being apart without exception, and living with solid hardship is what we need to do at this time. Our lives should consist of nothing but busting our asses. Well, yes and no. I agree with buckling down right now, but we need SOME time together, even if it’s only for a heartbeat. I often get the feeling some people aren’t satisfied unless I’m miserable. That’s not something I want to be for anyone, no matter how much I love them, or how important they are to me. If I can be with my husband for the holidays, I will be. If I can’t, it won’t be because they’ve guilt tripped me into staying alone.  I deserve better than that.

Okay…chin up, moving forward. I may try to start blogging a little more when time allows. If for no other reason than to process this damn whirlwind, of one of the most surreal winters I’ve had thus far.

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Halfway there

20151126_084823[1]Damn. Things are getting real.

My better half has now officially secured 2 jobs on the Oregon coast, and has currently began a 180 mile round trip commute to work for one of them. Though he’s having fun with his new KJ gig, it’s going slowly. The bar is dead, so there’s nights where he’s singing solo. It’s to be expected of course, as small coastal towns are dead in the winter months. However, the job has potential to expand to more nights, possibly weekends, and it will be an enjoyable source of supplementary income for us.

Lincoln City Chevron just hired Bob as a full time employee, and he’ll be starting work there sometime within this month. So now the pressure is on. Time to put in notices, start packing, and biggest of all, find a new place to live.  That’s going to be a challenge, since most of what we’ve seen so far is either out of our budget or has a waiting list. But who knows what might pop up,  there’s always hope for pleasant surprises. All we can do is take one day at a time, and think positive.

The pieces are slowly falling into place, my dream of a new home and change of life is just around the corner. It’s going to happen, and I still can’t believe it’s real. No, I won’t be living in an ocean front luxury condo, with a hot tub on the deck.  I won’t be beach bumming and partying  every day. Life will still have it’s problems. But – I will finally be somewhere I feel genuinely at peace. And that thought, amongst the chaos of relocating, brings such a comfort to my tired heart.

All tangled up

With a big change of life and location in my near future, I’m pretty much a big mess in every way imaginable. I’ll be moving from Beaverton for the first time in 40 years. My family isn’t making it any easier, they’re fraying the already fragile ends of my rope. I won’t go into details about it. But despite everything that’s been said and done, I’m a little broken over leaving my mom 90 miles behind.

I tried to watch Terms of Endearment the other day, a movie which has always reminded me of mom and I. I did not make it past the part where Emma is moving away from her mom, and she says, “I’ll miss you, mama.” I just lost it.

Yes, it’s silly. And so stupid that I could cry at the drop of a hat lately. I just try to cry alone, so I don’t bother anyone else.

Especially mom. We’ll have to talk less, at least for a while. Lately, conversations go nowhere, and just end up wrecking us both.

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